Change is Possible
Sometime after the bliss of enlightenment had settled, awareness shifted back into my body and my mind re-engaged. Not in the same way as before. Certainly not as my old ego had been. My mind, now clear of judgement, need, and blame, was open to guidance from Source and able to assimilate wisdom and information with discernment.
I could see life from a Universal perspective. We are all in this together, peace is absolutely possible, and unconditional love is the answer. I knew then - and still know now -that life is a gift of personal and collective lessons. Throughout history, these lessons have served to raise consciousness so that we may transform our current reality. Life is not meant to be a problem to be endured, but a puzzle to be solved - and we are not working on our puzzles alone.
Viewing life as a puzzle may be difficult, especially in light of past and ongoing personal and global suffering. There is no denying that humanity is focused on survival, mired in fear, and distracted by need, judgement and blame. For 55 years, I struggled in this existence myself.
My personal puzzle began to come together when I was introduced to an entirely different perspective. Challenged to release a victim mindset and relinquish the instinct to blame, I was asked to accept responsibility for my own thoughts and feelings. Highly resistant to this approach, I struggled for months before conceding that it might be the only path out of darkness. So, I accepted the challenge and ditched my ego. In letting go of my former identity, I created space to explore a new possibility - that who ‘I am’ might be an embodiment of unconditional Love. Even though I didn’t fully believe this concept at the time, there was enough authenticity in my efforts to trigger a permanent shift in consciousness.
From a newly-enlightened perspective, every life lesson in my past lay before me as clearly as stepping stones, Dominoes, or a connect-the-dots puzzle. Lovingly balanced to address both sides of my human duality, each spiritual lesson was an integral piece of the whole puzzle.
The dark pieces, carefully crafted through challenging life events and relationships, were designed to trigger and expose my ego. Before my shift, these life lessons were experienced as pain and suffering, strongly resisted and fiercely resented. In hindsight, I could see my shadow side clearly. Low self-esteem - a result of childhood trauma - had driven patterns of people pleasing, victim-hood and blame. Once I was able to accept that life circumstances and behavioural patterns created my ego, I could separate my Self from the lessons and forgive myself for believing I was anything other than a soul of light and love.
The light puzzle pieces were offered through synchronicities - signs of support and reminders of love - to guide me back to my true Self. I had forgotten who I was at a soul level, being firmly attached to my egoic identity, so Spirit reached out to the small part of me that was still connected to my soul - my inner child. The signs were deliberately linked to childhood memories of wonder and joy: kinship with the natural world (trees in particular), a fascination with light and colour (rainbows, prisms, marbles), a deep resonance with music, a pull towards stories of kindness, and delight in games of all kinds. Memories of building puzzles with my dad unlocked childhood connections to feelings of safety and belonging born from the energy of unconditional love - Source energy - soul energy.
Although signs from Spirit had gone unnoticed throughout my life, in hindsight I could see them so clearly that I laughed out loud. Recognizing connections between current life events and these inner child puzzle pieces was an integral part of soul reunion and inner child assimilation. Initially, the process of connecting the dots happened naturally: understanding that life is a puzzle to be solved rather than a problem to be endured; seeing myself in the vintage marbles I had rescued from the dirt behind my first house, and realizing that nearly all the streets where I’d lived, worked, or played were named for trees - Oak Street, Maple Street, Ash, Birch, Arbutus, Laurel, and Orchard Avenue. Fascinated, I began to research other aspects of my life and noticed a recurring pattern of the number 5 in addresses, significant time spans, and pivotal life events. A quick online search revealed that I am a Life Path 5 and a Scorpio - both associated with change and transformation.
Throughout my life, as each of these signs were presented, it was as if a Guide was whispering, “Remember…remember…remember,” and as each remembrance clicked into place, I began to grasp the extent of the support I had received throughout my life. Flooded with equal parts remorse and gratitude, I wondered how I could have been so blind. Had I known that each of us is supported by a team of Spirit Guides, continually working to help us remember our true selves, I might never have drifted to the edge of self-destruction—a place of crippling loneliness and despair.
No matter how dark the world gets, we are never alone. We matter, we are supported, and we are deeply loved. This knowledge alone could save lives.
When I began writing Lightworker, I wrote from a place of euphoria - a place of childlike wonder and joy. I had solved the puzzle! At the time, I wasn’t sure if it was only my puzzle that I’d solved or THE puzzle of life itself. Regardless, the solution was so simple that I wanted to shout it from the rooftops:
Peace is possible! Change is possible!
If someone had told me this years ago, I would not have believed it. Life was a struggle of endurance, and peace seemed like some unattainable fantasy.
Now, I know better. Reality can be changed. But change requires action, and the choice to work on your puzzle is yours alone.
We cannot expect or force others to change. The only thing we can change is our own mindset…our own perspective. But, if enough people accept this responsibility, we hold the potential to create real and lasting peace in this lifetime.
D 🩵
